Izumi Shu Birthday SS - 06/08/24

[nebulancer]

He would always look at the back of the man he idolized as if he were an older brother.

 

That back, for which silence spoke a thousand words, was cold yet warm, and it seemed weighty somehow.

That weight was likely the mass of the passion that the man kept hidden inside of him, equal to the very destiny he was burdened with.

It seemed that what the man yearned for did not exist within humans. It was part of a world only he saw, and what lay beyond: a thing far, far off into the distance.

That was why the man’s back always seemed to be so far away, as if it lay in a place where he couldn’t reach.

 

That man revered that same back, continuing to chase after him.

 

＊

 

One day, it happened suddenly.

 

That back disappeared from the man’s view.

He had left.

He didn’t speak much of his reason for doing so. The man simply patted him on the shoulder with a light touch.

The only things he left behind were the vast empty space his existence once was, and the deep scars etched into the man’s heart.

 

The man changed, with that day as his turning point.

 

The young boy who sought out patronage became an adult who could stand on his own.

Or rather – he tried to.

Deep within his eyes dwelt not the timid weakness he once had; there now lay a strong, burning desire to pursue something instead:

 

“Why did he leave?

If I want to learn that, I have to become capable enough to see the same thing he saw.”

 

So decided the man as he exerted even greater effort.

He greedily attempted to absorb all he could.

Not putting a single day to waste, he desperately continued putting in effort from the break of dawn to the depths of night.

He attempted to forget the pains pricking his heart by hurting himself.

He did attempt to become an adult, but in the end, he was still too immature.

He was too young.

 

However, the times would change.

 

The man became older, his body growing as well.

As if the frailty of him as a young boy were a thing of the distant past, those eyes naturally came to gain a strong, dazzling brilliance.

Before he knew it, that which he obtained as a result of all his effort had allowed his own self to shine brilliantly.

 

The source of his brilliance was the new bonds he’d made.

 

Companions who understood him, exerted great effort alongside him, aimed for the peak with him, supporting him.

He became capable of smiling naturally.

He became capable of joking around.

He shed his fear of showing weakness.

He understood it was fine to play around.

 

When he casually glanced next to him, the existence he’d once lost sight of was there, as if it were a given.

 

I can’t see his back anymore.

Instead, I see his profile from beside him.

I wonder when I’d lined up side-by-side with him?

The man beside him was indifferent to his surprise, patting the man on his shoulder. With a brotherly face, he laughed. “Good for you.”

 

He laughed back, returning the pat on his shoulder.