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nebulancer
Summary – Always calm, cool, and collected. The exceptional Goddess, who fulfills her work with a detached attitude, Kubou Ruri. And her assistant Tendouin Tsubaki. The women were content with the unemotional, businesslike work scene that happens in front of them every day. After all, their reasons to live were something aside from work.
“To think... you were ‘Hajime-sama’s Godly Stannie Camellia Soul’...!”
1. Drama – “A Cool, Strange Talker”
Tsubaki: It’s nice to meet you. I am Tendouin Tsubaki.
Having completed my preparatory training in the Institute, I have been chosen as your Goddess assistant.
Kubou: I am Kubou Ruri. I look forward to working with you.
Tsubaki: I will be in your care.
Kubou: I’ll be putting you to work now. I will be explaining the business duties.
My main job on Earth is fortune-telling.
Tsubaki: That... is a very important job.
How do you go about divining fortunes?
Kubou: I use different methods of divination according to my goal and the details of the consultation being asked, but I typically use a crystal ball and tarot cards. As for Western methods...
-
Reina: Gosh, I was shocked so bad, it knocked my socks off! The Goddess in charge of me was! Can you believe it!? The dorm mother! It was Miyu-san~!
Er, well, am I supposed to be surprised by the fact that the dorm mother’s actually a Goddess? She’s helped me out before, yet I didn’t even know~!
Tsubaki: I see. The ancient fortune-telling method of yore which you launched would fly off, soon landing very close to you.
Reina: I guess so! She’s an interesting person, and I felt like we were on the same wavelength.
I get the feeling that I’m blessed with who I got as my boss~
When she asked me what sorts of things I like, and I answered subcultures, she even took an interest in them~
Tsubaki: That is quite fortunate.
Reina: I! Know! Right~!
And Tsubaki, how’d yours go!?
Tsubaki: It ended favorably.
Reina: So, so? What kinda person was she?
Tsubaki: Well, let me think. Our wavelengths seemed to match up with one another.
Reina: Hwoeh~... You met someone who’s on the same wavelength as your signals and strange talk, right off the bat? That’s good to hear!
How’s her work? How’s it like?
Tsubaki: She works as a mysterious fortune-teller whose customers include influential figures of Earth’s developed countries.
I’ve heard that she is accoladed as a Holy Mother in all regions.
Reina: Ooh~! Perfect fit for the White Witch!
Tsubaki: Indeed. I’ll do my best.
Ever since I did fortune-telling at the cultural festival, it’s been my personal fixation.
My success rate is 100%.
Reina: You wouldn’t call that fortune-telling anymore. It’s just a prophecy at this point.
Oh, but your oracles sure are unique~
It’s a shame that you’re the only one who completely and perfectly understands what it means.
Tsubaki: I am simply using my signals... no, using what I see and hear, and transforming them into words.
Saying difficult things is not my intention.
Reina: Ahaha. I guess that’s something you have to work on, then.
Don’tcha think you’ll be able to get some training done under the tutelage of your Goddess, who’s a current fortune-teller to boot?
-
Reina: So, anyway! It’s been a while since we’ve become assistants to our Goddesses.
Tsubaki: By the way, Reina. What business do you have in my workplace?
Reina: We’re thinking about giving fortune-telling a try next time on Grand-Ma-Daughter Channel.
I’ve come here to make an offer to the White Witch Tsubaki and enigmatic fortune-teller Ruri-san!
Please! Could you ask Ruri-san for me~?
Tsubaki: I can’t predict how she will respond, but I’ll try to ask.
Reina: Thanks! Now that’s Tsubaki-sama for you!
I also wanna do some studying up on the guest for the project, so could you tell me about Ruri-san?
Tsubaki: Well, let’s see. She is someone who works punctually according to the schedule she has planned out beforehand.
Her skill in fortune-telling, too, is certain. She is very competent.
The satisfaction rate of her customers is 100%.
Reina: Hweh~! Sounds like she really is awesome!
So! Uh, how’s she like off work?
Tsubaki: I don’t know.
Reina: Whaddya mean, “I don’t know”? Like, do you know her hobbies or any other info?
Tsubaki: I have never conversed with her outside of work topics.
Reina: Eh!? Didn’t you say your wavelengths seemed to match!?
Tsubaki: Yes.
We’re similar in the way that we do not waste time with idle chatter.
It’s very quiet. We only talk as much as we need. That is how our work progresses.
Reina: So that’s what you meant by it~!?
Tsubaki: Are there any issues with it?
Reina: Well, I guess, as long as work’s progressing smoothly, it’s... fine...
But Miyu-san and I get along super swimmingly, so I don’t usually know the usual sense of distance~
Tsubaki: Ruri-san and I are boss and subordinate. Nothing more, nothing less.
Reina: Ooh, cool~
I guess that in and of itself is possible, but if I were in your shoes, I’d be a li~ttle bit lonely. It sorta feels like a lowball to me, personally~
But that might just be a way of working that’s perfect for you, Tsubaki.
Tsubaki: Nfufu. I suppose so. I feel as if work is worth my effort, so you needn’t worry about me.
About it being a lowball... Well, it’s fine. Because I have something I desire outside of work. Fufufu.
Reina: Ahh... ‘Cuz you’re doing your stannie activities alongside the White Demon Lord, huh~?
The most important thing is that you’re happily having your fill of your time off work.
-
[Tsubaki polishes her crystal ball.]
Tsubaki: This purple brilliance seems clear, unclouded. It resembles... the color of Hajime-sama’s eyes. ✨
I’ve done a terribly fine job, if I do say so myself. ✨
‘Tis a time for me to sing my own praises and nothing else ☆
♪ Crystal ball divination, purple crystal ball ♪
♪ Purple crystal ball, I’m a Hajime stannie YEAH ♪
Fu. Fu. Fu. Fu. I can even rap out this rhythm. Fufufu.
[The door opens, and Kubou walks in.]
Kubou: ...Were you saying something?
Tsubaki: No, nothing at all, ma’am. I have presently completed the maintenance of the apparatus.
Is there anything else for me to do?
Kubou: No, that’s enough for today. Let’s both leave.
Tsubaki: Then, today’s work is finished. Thank you for your hard work today.
Kubou: I could say the same. Good work.
By the way, I’ll inform you that I intend on taking a paid day off in the near future.
Tsubaki: Oh? When is it?
Kubou: This date.
Tsubaki: Oh. I have asked for a paid day off on that day, as well.
I have a prior engagement that I absolutely must attend to.
Kubou: I see, is that so? In my case, I had initially given up on something... which, by chance, was successfully fulfilled.
[ . . . ]
Tsubaki: Fortunately, we do not have any important jobs planned for this day.
Kubou: Perfect timing. Then, let’s both graciously take this day off.
Tsubaki: I agree. Let’s do so. Graciously.
-
Tsubaki: Fu... Fufufu...! I’ve been waiting so long for this joint live between Gravi and Procella!
Since it’s been so long, everyone seems to be quite fired up.
I hope I’ll be able to safely meet up with the mutual I promised to meet...
My specially customized Tsukiusa., whom I decked out just for today... I’m sure you shall guide me on my way. Now... guide me!
To my friend, the companion of my soul...!
Kubou: ...! Ah...
Excuse me. Judging by that Tsukiusa., are you “Hajime-sama’s Godly Stannie, Camellia Soul”-san!?
Tsubaki: Yes. And with your decked-out Tsukiusa., you’re... ...Ah.
Kubou: Eh? ...Goodness, gracious.
Tsubaki: Unbelievable...
Kubou: To think... you were “Hajime-sama’s Godly Stannie, Camellia Soul”-san...!
Tsubaki: And you were actually “Ikkyun’s smile easily feeds me three meals’ worth Lazurite”-san...!?
Kubou: ... *nods* ...Yes.
Tsubaki: *nods* ...Yes.
Tsubaki, Kubou: I look forward to accompanying you today.
Tsubaki, Kubou: ......No, I should be the one saying that.
Tsubaki: Anyway, we’re getting down to business right off the bat. I’ll be providing you the aforementioned item.
[T/N: When Tsubaki talks to Kubou in their otaku personas, Tsubaki drops the formalities and they talk casually with each other.]
Kubou: You have my thanks...! This envelope contains the price for it, including the handling fee. You may check inside.
Tsubaki: Hm. I see no issue.
Kubou: I have no issue with this, either. Wait, this...!?
THIS!?
*gasps* Could this possibly be!? A GODLY ARENA TICKET!?
I-Is this really all right!? For someone to have to give up a seat as godly as this... What terrible circumstances could they have gone through...!?
Tsubaki: The Goddess candidate Kisaragi Ai was originally planning to participate as well. I sent in three preliminary seat selections through the Hajime-sama Fanclub, which I am a part of.
Kubou: By Kisaragi Ai, you mean... The girl who works with Nogami Zen?
Tsubaki: The very same. Due to a spreading pandemic sweeping Earth, Zen-san alone cannot deal with her work, so Ai is accompanying her to the various places that they must attend to.
Kubou: I see. Nogami dives into the spiritual worlds of people whose hearts have fallen ill for a variety of reasons and shut themselves away, saving their souls. That is the type of Goddess she is.
That... cannot be avoided. They are hard at work, yet in the meanwhile, I’m playing around. My panging stings of guilt are growing, but... that’s that.
I declare that I will most definitely use the spiritual energy I gain here to delve back into my work with even greater intensity.
So please, forgive me...!
Tsubaki: I agree wholeheartedly.
Anyway, with that being the situation, I wondered what I should do with Ai’s ticket.
When I was looking for someone to take it up, I learned that my trustworthy mutual of many years, “Ikkyun’s smile easily feeds me three meals’ worth Lazurite”-san, had not managed to acquire tickets.
Thus, all I needed to do was contact her.
Kubou: Thank you very much for responding to a mutual in need, “Hajime-sama’s Godly Stannie, Camellia Soul”-san!
Tsubaki: We’re all in the same boat here.
Plus, it is a fan’s obvious duty to work hard, making sure that there are no empty seats during her fave’s concert.
Kubou: By the way, when you brought up three seats... There will be one more...?
Reina: TSUUUBAKI~! Keptcha~ waiting~!
Tsubaki: Oh, Reina. You came earlier than I expected.
Were you able to finish your affairs without a hitch?
Reina: Totesies of coursies!
Since I’m comin’ to Earth anyway, I got the new volume in first print!
Oh, and is this the person who responded to that ticket business?
Tsubaki: Yes. Allow me to introduce you.
Kubou: I will be in your company for today. I am “Ikkyun’s smile easily feeds me three meals’ worth Lazurite.”
Reina: Ah, nice to meetcha!
...Wait... huh? Have I... seen you before...? Hmm...?
Tsubaki: Also known as Kubou Ruri-san.
Reina: Also known... as Ruri-san?
*ding-dong~* Ahh! You mean the Goddess who’s in charge of—
...Wait.
EEooEEEeuuuEEEEHHHhh!?
You! Are!? The Goddess that! Tsubaki works under, right!? What’s this mean!?
Wait, no way!? Does this mean that the person you already knew beforehand through social media just coincidentally happened to turn out to be the Goddess you were assigned to support?
So basically, before you even met as Goddess and assistant, you were originally otaku buddies~!?
Tsubaki: I expected nothing less of you, Reina. Despite being surprised, you guessed everything correctly and also provided an apt explanation for the situation. Thank you.
Reina: Neither of you noticed until now...?
Tsubaki, Kubou: No, not at all.
Tsubaki: This world contains no such thing as coincidence. An encounter or incident that, at first glance, may seem to be coincidental, is the result of being guided by the vast flow of fate......
Kubou: We must have been deployed in the same workspace through the guidance of destiny’s web. However, here and now, we are neither boss nor subordinate.
Tsubaki: But of course. We are fans of our faves. As servants to our gods.
Our values of existence aside from that vary little... When faced with those we stan... we are all equal.
Reina: Umm, umm, uh! I don’t really get it, but sure, I agree!
I’m Ichisaki Reina! Nice working with you today!
Kubou: Yeah. Likewise. I think I’ll die when I’ve gone past my critical point from how precious they are once just the opening movie starts to play, but that is my instinct and dearest desire, so don’t pay me any mind.
Reina: I can tell that you’re a hardcore fan.
Ah! Looks like the venue’s opening up.
Tsubaki: Then, shall we make our way inside?
...Excitement.
Kubou: ...Excitement.
...I’m dead!
Tsubaki: I’m dead.
Reina: TOO SOON!
2. Drama – “Sure Enough, a Cool Strange Talker”
Kubou: Still... THIS IS SUCH A GODLY SEAT!
In just a few minutes, the world of light will spread before my eyes, and I’ll be able to gaze at my fave from this close up...!?
I will have had no regrets in life.
Ah...! I’m crying...!
Reina: Listen, that’s too soon.
Tsubaki: True. If you’re going to kick the bucket, do so after the performance.
Kubou: I’ll have been reduced to dirt by then, but hopefully, some of my bones remain.
Reina: Ah, so you’re going off the assumption that you’re gonna give up the ghost?
Kubou: No matter how I think of it... Just consider, for a moment. In the unlikely chance that I end up receiving fanservice this close up, do you even think I could return alive!?
*gasps* No. It is impossible.
None can bask in such a godly light and remain standing!
These past few years, Ikkyun’s fanservice has been reaching godlike levels!
It’s the godliest that godliness could be. He’s been thoroughly pulling off his dance moves, and on top of that, he aims carefully and settles the score when it matters most!
A formidable and fully equipped technique.
Do you even know how many times I’ve been shot through!?
Reina: This sorta vibe feels so familiar to listen to...
Kubou: Specially for today, I made an Ikkyun picket fan...! Will this... enter his line of sight... at this distance!?
Reina: WHOA! Awesome, this is a crazy detailed design! I get the feeling this took tons of time~
Kubou: The time I spent making it... Basically, the time I offer up to Ikkyun. In order to work it all out, I have a rule of punctually separating my work and private lives.
Tsubaki: I totally understand.
It is the absolute height of folly to let stannie activities stagnate due to work manipulating you. Perfectly managing both sides, working and stanning alike, is what makes a true fan.
Reina: Ah. So that’s how it is. These two are sorta similar~
Tsubaki: By the way, I, too, have made a Hajime-sama picket.
“My Love is a Big Bang.”
Kubou: Ah...! I can feel your passionate feelings getting through.
Oh, that’s right. I made a prediction for what would be the setlist...
Tsubaki: Let me take a look.
Reina: Whoa, it’s totally packed to the brim with writing!
Tsubaki: Nice predictions.
Before we head into the solos, do you think I’d be able to hear Hajime-sama sigh IRL during the Gravi unit song?
Though Paint It Black is doubtlessly amazing, GRAVITIC-LOVE has that part after the six of them sing. Hajime-sama alone utters an, “Ahh,” in that sigh.
I’d become either the atmosphere or the wall and feel the very vibration of that sigh. I want... *grip* ...TO FEEL... *GRIP* ...THAT VIBRATION!
Reina: O-oh, yeah. Sure. If I were also a Hajime stan, I’m pretty sure I’d feel the same way. I can understand.
But thinking about it calmly, you’re lowkey freaked in the head.
Tsubaki: Freaks don’t need to enter his field of vision. As long as I can gaze at him, that’s enough ☆
Reina: You’re one top-class freak.
Kubou: I’m the same. As long as I can keep seeing Ikkyun’s sparkly, shining smile, that’s enough for me.
However, these days, Ikkyun has, alongside his smile, begun to emit sensual allure befitting of a man his age...!
Tsubaki: When you speak of sensual allure, then Hajime-sama comes to mind. Just how much sexy can he ooze?
It is an eternal riddle as to how his unit members can remain so unconcerned despite being so close to him.
Even Mr. Yayoi has duet songs with him, yet... *gasps* ...!
Could it be...!?
Reina: Eh? What’s up?
Tsubaki: The glasses which Mr. Yayoi is wearing have a specially made belay in place to prevent him from being overwhelmed by Hajime-sama’s sexiness.
Reina: Ahh... Mm. Oh, yeah. Maybe~
Kubou: I’m expecting Ikkyun and Rui’s duet song.
I want to look fixedly upon the duo’s precious world forever and ever.
The position next to Ikkyun belongs to Rui and Rui alone.
The only one allowed to wholeheartedly accept that smile of his... is Rui and Rui alone!
Tsubaki: Oh? I considered you to be a fan of one member only. That’s surprising.
Kubou: Of course I adore them all! My top fave is Ikkyun, but...
Procella is bound together by strong bonds that none can come in between.
Even the White Demon Lord... despite seeming as if he plays around so much, is actually always thinking about his unit members! I have no doubt that he’s dedicated to his unit members when no one’s looking!
Reina: Mm! Ah—Ahh... Well, er...
Tsubaki: *whispering* Don’t, Reina. We are dabbling in personal matters today.
We are nothing more than members of Hajime-sama’s Godly Fanclub.
Though the truth is, Shun is either sleeping or off stanning Hajime-sama when no one’s watching.
Reina: *whispering* I don’t wanna crush her dreams, so I’ll keep quiet.
Tsubaki: *whispering* Yes. Let’s lay the topic to rest here with the thought that controlling one’s imagination is a wonderful skill to have.
Kubou: What are you two whispering about?
Reina: Well, uh~!
[Cheers rise up, and the concert sounds pulse.]
Kubou: !? Th-the countdown’s... starting...!?
Tsubaki: I’m ready anytime! ......Let’s freakin’ do this, y’all!
Kubou: Aw yeah, come at me!! GRAHHH!
I’M GONNA LOVE THEM SO DAMN HARD I HIT CUTENESS OVERLOAD! I’M GONNA BURST OPEN MY GODDAMN GUTS AND FREAKIN’ DIE!!
Tsubaki: SECONDED! WE’LL BE TOGETHER WHEN WE DIE!
Reina: I don’t think that’s how your characters were written!?
...Penlight, switched on~!
Tsubaki: Heightening heartbeats... My light is already turned to purple, greeting Hajime-sama.
...!
All: KYAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!
[Screaming.]
-
Tsubaki: *sighs* ...Supreme bliss.
Kubou: Today’s concert... will be something to remember the rest of my life...!
Reina: That sure was fun~! I totally burned myself up! Concerts are~ the best~✨
Kubou: Ikkyun’s sparkling smile was sparkly...✨ It was so cute... that he sparkled ✨ So cute... and sparkling ✨ ... So cool... and sparkling ✨
Reina: You’re at a loss for words~
Tsubaki: When Hajime-sama ran through my mind... I remember the numerous songs and performances which shook up my heart... I want to record this afterglow in my heart for even a second longer.
Kubou: Agreed. But a portion of my memory has been lost.
I got fanservice... from Ikkyun... so close up...!
URK— I can’t breathe—
Reina: Wow, he rendered her short of breath by just replaying in her mind! Ikkun, nice job~
Kubou: URGH—! ...*wheeze, wheeze*...
I was on the verge of death due to Ikkyun’s fanservice... and I am revived thanks to Ikkyun’s smile!!
Tsubaki: Our faves have a direct link to our very lives.
Reina: Oh, I get that~ True, when I see my fave being in good spirits, I’m also put in good spirits~!
Kubou: Yeah! Just knowing the fact that my fave is alive provides me as much nourishment as three square meals... no, four! ✨
Tsubaki: It provides me five meals’ worth of nourishment. ✨
Kubou: Yes, indeed! Five meals are nothing!
Tsubaki: We must continue working starting tomorrow in order to save up meal fees.
Kubou: Heh! We’re of the same mind.
Tsubaki: Indeed. We are of the same mind.
[They clasp hands.]
-
Tsubaki: Ruri-san. A new request has come in for 5 P.M. today.
It seems that the president of a certain developed country has something they would like to ask you incognito.
Kubou: Good. I understand. Hurry and begin preparations to descend to Earth.
Tsubaki: Roger that.
Kubou: ...Heh.
Tsubaki: What is it?
Kubou: Nothing at all.
Tsubaki: ... *chuckles* My senses must be a bit more astute today.
Kubou: *smiling* No. Things are going as they do normally.
Tsubaki: Normally...? Why, yes. This is our everyday life, is it not?
